Friday, July 14, 2006


I just read a great article about Floyd Landis in the NYT. Reading this article, I got the same feeling I got reading a lot of what I've read about Lance and, really, a lot of what I've read about almost all of the so-called greats. And that feeling is this: you could endow most people with "both" the same raw physical talent of these athletes "and" a fuckin' boatload of performance-enhancing drugs and enter them in the TDF and they might last three stages. Maybe. It reminds me of a couple of my racing home-boys, who truly believe they are very different people. And in many ways they truly are. But if the topic is how they race, they are the exact same breed.

I believe this is why people are so eager and open to believing that all these TDF guys are dopers. To believe otherwise is to believe that normal people just can't do this stuff--it simply isn't physically possible. Waiter, I'll have another caramel mocha latte, please, and could you hurry that 'cause my beemer is double-parked.

All elite racers are just freaks. Not normal. They take drugs to do that stuff. I don't have to take drugs to to ride my wave runner, so that's why I do that instead of SuperWeek or the TDF. That shit's stupid. Anybody up for 18 holes?

So 99.9% of the population succumbs to the existence that our forefathers earned us the opportunity to live---to live a life where no pain means no pain. And what this amounts to is a society where obesity is at epidemic proportions, where spectating equates to participation and where the attainment of a category two racing license is the equivalent of an AARP card.

Whoa! Did he just bash the venerable cat II license?

Yes. And I meant it.

I'm sorry, but I know a lot of guys for whom the attainment of a cat II license is the beginning of the end of their racing. They have the ability to upgrade, but it's little more than a penile extension. They lack either, or both, the time or the commitment to train and race as a two or a one, yet having that license means they gotta line up against people who make both the time and the commitment.

Guess what's gonna happen?

So what we have here is what you might call a conundrum. And what's the logical extension? Talk---and quitting. You hear a lot of talk about how racing is not important. You hear a lot of talk about priorities. You hear about "expenses" you hear about "wrecking" you hear about "burnout" you hear about how racing is fucked up and anybody who's successful "must" be a doper.

I have two home-boys who outwardly seem as different as night and day. But when it comes to training and racing these two are the same animal. They start with not bullshitting themselves and then they don't have to bullshit anyone else--all they have to do is race. Yeah, Butthead and Dino have different styles, sure enough, but when it comes to racing those boys both are bona fide. Later.


Blogger Butthead said...

bona fide

8:44 AM  
Blogger Lanky said...

boner fide.

11:22 AM  

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